Nudity at Restaurants; Restaurant Weeks Under Fire; Diner Complaints; What Restaurant Hosts Wish You Knew; Pickles Are Hot; But, Entrees Are Not?

Lisa Vanderpump demands to know why Adrienne failed to invite Jiggy to her spa day.

Dining and restaurant news…

* Clothing-optional dining. Are nude diners coming soon to a restaurant near you? I, for one, hope not. [Los Angeles Times]

* Real trouble for Real Housewife restaurateur? Lisa Vanderspump responds to claims of a poor dining experience. Jiggy, however, has been silent on the matter. [Gather]

* The honor system. Pay-what-you-can dining comes to Billyburg. If only Per Se would institute this policy. Sigh. [Gothamist]

* Win-win? Are restaurant weeks actually good for the restaurants? [Forbes]

* State your complaint. What diners don’t like when dining out. [Press Democrat]

* Sifton signs off. The New York Times critic reflects on his time as a restaurant critic. [The New York Times]

* Hot or not? New trends in hotels and restaurants. [4 Hoteliers]

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Thomas Keller’s Last Meal; More Restaurant Menus Go Gluten Free; Flash Photography, Diaper-Changing Ruining Meals; Sifton’s Best Reviews

She portrayed the Queen of the Nile, but Elizabeth Taylor did not eat a Mediterranean diet.

Dining and restaurant news…

* Hold the gluten. More restaurants are offering menu items that are safe for celiac disease sufferers to eat. [Winston-Salem Journal]

* The game is chicken. Thomas Keller (The French Laundry) on unacceptable behavior and what his last meal would be. []

* Flashers ruining meals. If you must photograph your food, leave your flash off. Thank you. [The New York Times]

* This doo is a don’t. If you dine out with your child, please remember that the table is not a changing station. Again, thank you. [Sun Times]

* Pump up the volume. Why restaurant music is often too loud or too lame. [Austin 360]

* Speaking of music. Even if it isn’t always music to your ears, per se, it’s music and restaurants have to pay for it. [InsideScoop SF]

* Dining with the Star Trekkers. Where Captain Picard would dine aboard the Enterprise. [Geek of the Day]

* The Liz Taylor diet. You may not lose any weight, but you’ll probably enjoy yourself immensely noshing on the notorious man eater’s menu. [Village Voice]

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Bauer’s Star Strategy, Sifton’s Music, and the Arguments For and Against Critics

* New York Times restaurant critic Sam Sifton makes a lot of musical references. [Eater]

* Also, he doesn’t mean to be a (unprintable word). [Grub Street NY]

* Frank Bruni discusses his life as a regular citizen. [Food and Wine, Part I and Part II]

* In case you were wondering what critic Gael Greene loves and where she eats (and you know you were JUST wondering those very things), wonder no more. [Insatiable Critic]

* Speaking of critics, what are they good for? [The Atlantic]

* Something? [SF Weekly]

* Nothing? [Dallas News]

* Meanwhile, Chronicle critic Michael Bauer explains how he awards stars. [InsideScoopSF]

* …but, apparently, no one really cares. [Modern Luxury]

Critical Mess: McNally Calls Platt Overweight; Cuozzo Calls McNally Big, Fat Crybaby

Critical-MessLast week, Manhattan restaurateur Keith McNally took restaurant critic Adam Platt to task on a VERY personal level, attacking his appearance, after Platt penned a lackluster review of McNally’s latest venture, Pulino’s (where former A16 chef Nate Appleman now works). In an open letter to the New York Magazine scribe, McNally calls him “out of touch,” “balding,” and “overweight.” He also accuses Platt of inhabiting a middle-aged world. It should be noted that McNally is almost 59 years old, which is technically far beyond middle age (unless he lives to 116), so perhaps his remark wasn’t ageist so much as envious.

In the past two days, New York Post critic Steve Cuozzo sprung to his counterpart’s defense, telling McNally to “shut his yap,” while, elsewhere, restaurateur Tony May, of SD26, noted his displeasure with New York’s restaurant critics. In contrast to McNally, however, May kept things strictly professional, positing that many critics do not understand “the true flavors of Italian cuisine.” Meanwhile, Eater NY took a look at the scorecard for newish restaurant critic Sam Sifton of The New York Times, analyzing his first seven months of reviews, for fairness and trends.

Finally, the Los Angeles Times, known for its fine food criticism, looks at the skills it takes to be an astute-yet-svelte restaurant critic. After all the recent name-calling, is this a job anyone even wants?